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Written by Julia Megret
Hey guys! We’re back with another IPA personification post! This time we’ll be looking at the close-mid vowels and their close relative – the schwa.
[e]
The athletic one that wears a baseball cap all the time.
The one who always brings the beer. And only that one brand.
Gives off major mommy-issue vibes.
[ø]
Always the designated driver.
If they have to choose a flavour, it’ll always be chocolate.
Will do anything for food.
[ɘ]
Rowdy.
“Hey bro” type of guy.
But will cry if you show him sad animal videos.
Especially that one where the raccoon washed its cotton candy :’(
[ɵ]
Gets distracted so easily.
Has been compared to a panda more than once (because of their dark eye circles lol).
Has no idea about the future but bro’s just riding the tide.
Somehow not dead yet.
[ɤ]
Was forced to play the piano as a kid but loves it now.
Volunteers to play in elderly homes and hospitals.
Somehow seen as the family disappointment??
Major workaholic vibes (I’m telling you).
[o]
Loud AF.
The one that voluntarily answers questions and presents for the whole group.
Bops their head to imaginary music.
Will show you pictures of their dog even if you didn’t ask them to.
[ə]
Unbothered.
The most chill dude you’ll ever meet.
Will wink at everyone except their crush.
Cause they’re shy ok?
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